EVENT A: Day 1 of spanish 1 with Mrs. Lommel- I automatically made it to her bad side when I laughed at her comment about one of the multiple "learning songs" that we have to sing in there because she said "if you're REALLY lucky, i'll break out my MARACCAS!!!!" me and Amanda tried SO hard not to laugh, but some things just can't be helped...
EVENT B: Continuing with Mrs. Lommel's strange obesession with learning songs (mostly from her CD called "sing, laugh, dance, and eat tacos 2") there is a particular PARROT in the songs that randomly squaks or sings that she decided she would name PACO....thats right, Paco the parrot!! She was obesessed with this parrot for a very long time and even printed out a little paper parrot and taped it on an index card and laminated it to be her own personal Paco...this was strange but it became REALLY weird when she started talking to the index card believed by her to be Paco to Parrot and pretending that it was talking back to her saying ONLY things in spanish because it was "no hablo ingles" or something.... then she would like randomly SQUAWK when the mood striked her....our class could hardly keep composure when this occured so we decided to put an end to it...thats right, the onyx Paco was stolen, i dont know by who, and SOOOOMEBODY left some Paco notecards with a nail through the Paco's head, or hanged, shot, whatever in the make up work tray....and we havent had as many visits from Paco since
EVENT C: This lady is just completely and totally....DISGUSTING!! We learned not to eat anything in her class that SHE made or is distributing from my friend Lawrence and Eva that said when they were in her spanish 2 class last semester, she was passing out cake and she LICKED the knife and KEPT CUTTING and giving people pieces but they were all like aaah...umm thats alright no thanks--then on foregin food day in our class we came back at the end of the day to get our dishes and she was sticking her fingers in people's food and then LICKING them off and STICKING THEM BACK IN!! Andy, Amanda, and I were all just like aaah gross!! that is just....uncivilized
EVENT D: Another even involvng food...or a food container its all the same....yeah so she had had this like white dish sitting on her counter since the day we had come in the class, and my sources say that it was even before that that the mysterious dish had been sitting there...i was always sorta afraid to look in it to see what might be growing in there, but one fine day i definently found out. We were making clocks for the time unit so we needed something round to trace aound and Mrs. Smelly Lommelly was trying to find something of the right size so she goes to the counter and grabs the dish and sticks it RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME on MYYY paper and i was like....AAH!! and so i looked in it, not really of my own accord and there is some kind of reddish-orangeish film around it, like there had been tomato sauce that spoiled, which was still gross but not as much as i would have though, you know, like stuff growing out of it and all but it was still extremely nasty
EVENT E: This may possibly be the most disgusting thing she has done so far this year--the day she THREW UP!! And no, she didnt make it to the bathroom. This was at the point in time when I sat in the back corner of the class with Justino so i didnt get the full audio effect....we didnt even know what was goin on until I saw Andy from the front of the class turned around and lookin like he was sick himself and i was like whats wrong? and hes like ahh shes puking!! and i all looked over at her and she was like all bent over the trash can just pukin out her guts and like everybody was just totally grossed out like plugging our ears and all looking away and 2 or 3 girls like left and then after it was all finally over she WOULDNT TAKE OUT THE TRASH!!!! Were all like oooomg and then shes all like wow what a nice representation of "sick" or "enfermo" were all like nah, ur tha enfermo one...
EVENT F: So there is this guy in our class named Javier, and he came to class for the first few days but then he just like, quit and had all the administration looking for him like all day because he would come to school, but not go to class...but one day after about 2 months of no Javier, Mrs. Lommel found him in the hall and pretty much literally dragged him into class. Were all shocked at his appearance and smelly lommelly thinks she's big stuff now for finding him when nobody else could so she is going to call the office and tell them that she's got him and if they want to come and get him or whatever, but when she is on the phone, she has her back to the class. So Javier is sitting by me, and we were the colsest row to the door and so while she was on the phone acting all important, he just gets up veeeery quietly and walks out the door, her not noticing until she turns around and to her dismay, he has dissapeared and shes all ike "CLAAAASS!! why didnt you tell me that he was running away?!" we were like eh we got his back so she all had to call the office back and tell them that he ran away.
EVENT G: The outfits. Oh, the outfits. No outfit can work with busted up old blue and purple slip-on sketchers made for like 10-year-olds on about a 50-year-old OR navy blue VELCRO shoes...who wears VELCRO?! These two shoe selections especially dont go with any time of purple or wine-colored VELVET articles of clothing, and especially, (this is my personal favorite) SWEATER SKIRTS....shes got like a normal loose knit sweater thing and it looked kinda strangely normal, until she stood up. She had a coordinating SWEATER SKIRT!! It was quite possibly the ugliest thing i've ever seen...
EVENT H: Every day, to add to the disgusting smell of her room, she eats some LEAN CUISINE for lunch every single day!! All the people in 3rd lunch are from the vocational building and we all walk back in when lunch is over and eevrybody is like OMG what is that smell?? And every day, its that wonderful smell of some overcooked lean cuisine just pouring out of mrs. Lommell's smelly room and WE have to walk back into the brunt of it all!! It's SO disgusting....
EVENT I: Andy and I have been trying now for awhile to figure out the mystery behind Mrs. Lommel's car. See, she doesnt DRIVE to work but she does have her son bring her and come and pick her up in the afternoons. We speculated initially that her car had broken down and it was the one in the staff parking lot that was covered up with one of those little busted car cover things and it was really like some kinda brown pinto under there OR this other car with these mexican little seat covers that was madd busted too but then we discovered the truth behind it all. Her son had actually wrecked her car so he had to come and get her and her daughter, Joanna, which wasnt as juicy as we had hoped but still these other options for cars were QUITE likely to be hers...
EVENT J: So who wouldn't like a nice, big HUG from Mrs. Smelly Lommelly?! Yes, thats right she decided that to show verbs, she was going to HUG us!! She's like "humm....a verd could be like, hug, whoooo cooulddddd iiiiii hug????" by this time the whole class is clenched onto their desks trying to avoid eye contact and hoping and praying theyr'e not the victim. So she was walking around the class on the prowl for somebody to hug....and she was coming STRAIGHT FOR ME but, lucky for me, she diverged at the last second and went to Carlitos, who is this thug guy that sits behind me with the gold teeth and all, and is just hugging all up on him and the whole class is just trying to suppress laughter as hard as they can and she finally stops hugging him, much to his releif, and goes on looking for another innocent victim and goes to Javier, who is by no means going to let her hug him so she almost put her arm around him and he just goes "NO!!!!" and like ducked away and she was like "oooh, its alright, i was just going to do the verb of slapping!!" and hes like ahh get away and the she sees poor Justino in the front row and gives him a big old hug and he was just turned around the whole time so that i could see him and let me tell you, by the look on him face i think he realllllllly enjoyed that hug...
EVENT K: The syst. Oh, the syst. She tries to make an excuse for wearing those kind of stylish shoes she wears, and it was that she has this huge lumpy SYST on her foot. She was like "Now, dont think that i dont know my shoes dont match but i have to wear these because i have this thing on my foot...a syst and sometimes it just fills up with all this liquid and i have to wear these special shoes so that it doesnt POP!!" were all like....eeew...
EVENT L: So on some days, the classroom is really really cold. This one girl was all like saying how cold she was so good 'ol Mrs. Lommel, being the gracious person she is, offered them her sweater to wear. (I'm sure she warmed up real quick at this offer) Then, to make it all worse, she said "I take it home and wash it.....SOMETIMES!!".....yeah then she warmed up...
EVENT M: Wow all the way from the counting unit in the beginning of espanol uno!! It's the infamous OLE GAME!! I think we had to count in digits of like 3 or some other number and when there wasn't one in a certain amount of time, whoever's turn it was would have to say "OLE!!!!" and **snap with attitude** because you have to go around the room from person to person all quick and nobody is that excited about the OLE game so when they have to say ''OLE!!'' it was more like an........ole.......**oh, snap, kinda** and she was all like "ohh, Noo Nooooo Nooooo!! Like this!! *OLE!!!!!!!! *SNAP(with waaaaay too much attitude)* and so Aaron did and she was all ike YEEESS!! Si senor aaron!! but no, we dont like the OLE game.
